Don’t be Afraid…

Have you ever met someone who was so use to being mistreated that when they met someone who treated them good… they didn’t know how to receive it and pushed them away. As you are reading this you may realize that you may even be that person.

Sometimes we allow fear to take over in different ways and it can show up in various forms. Let’s speak specifically about relationships. We all may have put up defense mechanisms that we thought would protect us from getting hurt because we’ve been hurt or watched others get hurt. Understand that when we build these walls…the wall then gives us a false sense of security. The wall can actually keep us from attaining what we truly desire. I don’t want you to be afraid…

Let’s dive in… you meet someone and everything is new (for both people). Most of us have natural fears of the unknown… However, if you are a believer… that’s where your faith should hold you down. You may feel like you like someone or feel like you may be falling for them and you become afraid. When you allow yourself to fall for someone… there are risk involved. Similar to being an entrepreneur, lol We then have to incorporate trust for another person which can affect us and then we feel exposed and vulnerable. So, we become afraid…

There are things from our past that have a hold on us and we don’t realize how much they affect us and how they can possibly affect new relationships. These hurts can stem from our childhood all the way to the present day. Whatever happened to you… may affect your perception of someone and/or force us to keep distance. Intimacy could also be an issue if it brings up old hurts and makes us afraid.

What happens when you avoid relationships or sabotage any you attempt? You may believe things like: love is dangerous, I don’t need anyone, I don’t deserve it, or I will just avoid it all together because I may end up hurt. I don’t want you to be afraid friend… all of the things that are new for you… all of the good positive feelings you feel… the things that have never been done for you before but this new relationship is bringing positive energy… embrace it and let go of fear… let go of being afraid.

Some of us struggle with the thought of being unlovable… let that simmer. You yourself or the other person may feel like they don’t deserve to be loved. We may not see our true value and believe that anyone could truly care and want us to truly be great. We can’t be afraid. There are times were joy may bring pain and we have to make time to deal with what comes up so we have the ability to move forward. We don’t want to be fearful of “going all in”… just let the moments take its course and see what comes up. We are letting go of being afraid…

I had a conversation with someone recently and they said that they were afraid to move forward in a relationship because they felt like the other person liked them too much. They said that they weren’t sure if moving forward was the right thing to do. They cared about the persons feelings and wasn’t sure if they would make the time for the person or if they would too feel the same way at some point. I then asked them a few questions, Do you like this person? What are some things that you like? Is this person different? How does this person make you feel? Do you want this person to walk away and never see them again? The truth is love can sometimes be unbalanced and we have to be open to live in the moment and see what arises.

We can feel many different emotions for someone in a matter of minutes… hours even. From anger, to love, to irritation, skepticism, etc… I could go on, lol. If we worry about these feelings we block things from happening in those moments. If we allow being afraid or let worry in… it could hinder us from building a relationship with someone… we could push someone away that could truly make us happy.

Friends, these things go for any kind of relationship…It doesn’t happen over night but let’s be intentional today. Let’s make a commitment to self-development and leaving our comfort zone. Let’s not be afraid and make room for being in moments that provide good memories and great energy.

Until next time Kings and Queens…

With love,

Fontashia